


the faults of being human

by BelievingOreo



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Sburb/Sgrub Sessions, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/F, Humanstuck, Prank Wars, Roommates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-10
Updated: 2018-05-29
Packaged: 2019-04-21 02:11:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14274672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BelievingOreo/pseuds/BelievingOreo
Summary: Vriska can't believe how incredibly awful her luck is. Not only was she dumped by her first serious girlfriend and then kicked off the ship they were both meant to volunteer on due to “incompetent sailing." But now she was stuck living with the one person who hates her more than possibly anything else. No one could have mentioned the other roommate was Terezi Pyrope of all people?





	1. sent adrift

**Author's Note:**

> hey this is my first actual like multi chap thing thats a full connected story whats up
> 
> i love validation and strive 2 b better so lmk any likes dislikes or issues please and thanks c:
> 
> ps i hate pesterlog coding this was so dumb

Somehow the sight of the harbor was both comforting and sickening. Perhaps it was a comfort to be back on solid ground; perhaps it was disappointing to know she couldn’t even do the one thing she always wanted to. 

Most likely it was both. Whoever the idiots were on that ship knew nothing when it came to actual sailing. How was standing on the mast and shouting about enemy ships even “inappropriate behavior.” 

Vriska sighs as the ship coasts to the dock and is tied down. She relishes in the last moments of surprisingly comfortable sway of the ocean. The stillness of the concrete below was as much a shock as it was unwelcome. 

She had lasted only a single month upon the ship Mindfang before being told that she was a “havoc of a crew member.” Who knew “nothing of an actual ships running and only caused troubles for the rest of the volunteers.” Vriska had scoffed at the idea, if anything they didn’t know how to have some fun. Still, that couldn’t stop them from kicking her off the boat as soon as possible. So here she was, stuck back where she started and with nowhere to stay. Another case of horrible luck. When had she even had any semblance of just decent enough luck.

No one Vriska actually knew would be able to give her a place to sleep, if they were even willing. John might, but Vriska didn’t want to have to face staying in his family home. It would be a bit awkward to stay with the guy you once thought you were in love with, even if it was ages ago.

So roaming the streets and trying to make a decision on what to do it was. Lugging her small pack of belongings, Vriska set off to wander the city deciding that some ice cream would be her first order of business. Several hours passed like this and it was when she was staring blankly at a park fountain that her phone rang.

Vriska answered without checking the caller id, “Hello?”

“Vriska! I heard from a little source of mine that you need a place to stay for a bit. Where are you, I’ll let you stay over at my apartment until you get back onto your feet again.” She really should check who’s calling her more and who’s feeding her cousin this info. 

Aranea continued on as if Vriska had agreed, though really there was no choice, “I bet you’re at the park near the harbor aren’t you. Anything interesting to stare at hopelessly there?” 

How Aranea was able to figure that little tidbit so quick, Vriska will never know. It’s like she knew everything simply by just existing and being a total dork. “Oh definitely, this fountain is just a well of drama. More interesting than those soaps I know you enjoy binging.” Vriska’s voice is dry and rough, she vehemently ignores that fact.

“I’ll be there within the hour,” Vriska could hear Aranea gathering herself and opening the door, “don’t you dare move Vriska. You’re staying with me whether you like it or not.” 

Groaning loudly into her phone, Vriska agrees to stay put and hangs up on the meddlesome force that is Aranea Serket. Now she just had to sit here for an hour and purposefully not think about what, or more specifically who, caused her to be in this position. Broken hearts rarely had anything good to add to any situation, but her’s couldn’t help but whisper that it was her own fault. Vriska could only agree. 

She people watched silently, feeling jealous of the young teen couple sitting on the fountain ledge. They were so naive and young, fully believing their love would last more than a month. It probably could, more likely Vriska was just bitter and jealous of that innocent love. Her hands twitched to plug in her earbuds and play songs about heartbreak, she had some dignity still. Facing a first serious heartbreak was never easy though, and by the time Aranea arrived Vriska had managed to play a total of eight sad songs. The perfect number, so a perfect time to stop.

“Is this all you really have?” Aranea asked walking up to Vriska and taking her single bag of personal items into her arms, “What did she make you do with the rest?” 

Vriska grimaced, she really didn’t want to talk about any of the circumstances surrounding having to crash at her cousin’s place. Instead she decided to walk to where she could see Aranea’s car idling and waiting for it’s owner’s return. Eventually she decided on answering as she entered the car, “I sold it all. It was her idea, something about having money to stockpile on. On the plus side it does mean I have something saved to get back on my feet. I won’t bother you for long cuz.”

The face Aranea made at the shortened word meant Vriska had won, no more prying questions about her most recent breakup for the rest of the night. Go Vriska. Unfortunately it didn’t mean she wouldn’t still talk about it, nothing could stop Aranea from talking about whatever it is she had her mind on. 

“Vriska, you know you can stay as long as you need. I haven’t seen my dear baby cousin in so long! I hate to admit that I haven’t checked up on you as often as I might have needed to, but I am here now…” This was when Vriska stopped listening to Aranea’s tirade, instead choosing to look blankly out the window in as dramatic a fashion as possible.

Aranea kept prattling on about how she cared deeply for Vriska and that she was a delight to have regardless of what someone might have said recently. Or something, honestly to Vriska it just sounded like, “I care for you so much, because I’m a soft weak excuse of a relative to you. This shameful weakness needs to be shown at every possible moment, I will keep talking and talking until the end of time. All just to kill you and everyone else of boredom with my useless stories that have little to no relevance. Except they do, but it’s so drawn out that it’s hardly worth anything beyond maybe a good few moments of story.”

Eventually the car is quiet save the small sounds coming from the radio, for once Aranea seems to have run out of words. Vriska has never been more thankful for anything in her life. Literally never, there is nothing else she could have wanted. She can die a satisfied woman now. The cars pulls to a stop, the quaint little apartment building before them as incredibly plain as Aranea. How fitting, Vriska thinks as she clambers out and into the building. 

Settling into the guest room Aranea had managed to set up was unfortunately, not a quiet affair. The two bickered about almost anything. Vriska saying just the couch was enough and Aranea refusing to treat her closest family in such a cold manner. Or Vriska trying to make dinner in an unspoken appreciation, even as Aranea constantly tried to shover her out of the kitchen claiming that guests should not have to cook. The first argument, Aranea had won; the second, Vriska. 

After the first night, it didn’t take much to become settled into Aranea’s home. Vriska did her best to avoid her cousin and so she danced around, crawling out late at night and only leaving her room to go to the job she had at the quiet bookshop she managed to get. Or going out with John to see whatever new movie he wants to see, because no one else in his friend group has any sense of a good movie.

It was about two weeks into the “Serket Cousins’ Shared Living Extravaganza” that Vriska got a text message. Which rare enough on it’s own, wasn’t from John nor was it from Aranea aka near impossible. Leading to something akin to a dramatic scream as Vriska threw her phone after reading who had just texted her. 

AA: i heard you needed a place to crash?

Why her of all people? Vriska was near crying, she couldn’t tell if it was frustration that this is how low she’s gone or just being glad that Aradia messaged her and wasn’t set on destroying everything she cared about. Her phone vibrated again, a small scream escaped her throat one more.

AA: vriska? did john give me the wrong number  
AA: no he didnt i just asked  
AA: anyway my friend has a spare room i thought itd be good to ask you before he gives it anyone else  
AG: What is it to you if I need a place to stay.  
AG: I thought you hated me, after all I did it would make sense for you to hate me.  
AG: How much would it 8e?  
AA: :)  
AA: im not sure! let me ask him  
AA: he said the rent is around $612  
AA: hes willing to set up a meeting whenever if you want!  
AA: and i dont hate you  
AA: not anymore at least

Feeling both awkward and conflicted the whole way through, Vriska managed to decide on when to see the apartment and meet her possible new roommate. Though honestly, as long as she didn’t hate the guy too much anything was better than living with Aranea. Living with Aranea was akin to joining the convent and promising herself to God. No one was allowed over, no drinking on weekdays, no weed? It was like Aranea wanted her to be a better person or something, and god forbid that ever happened. So new apartment with some friend of Aradia’s; Aradia who hated her and was part of the reason she left university? It’ll be fiiiiiiiine.

* * *

It was not fine, none of this was fine at all. The friend was Sollux, Sollux Captor. Vriska should have asked who exactly was the friend, but of course it was this nerd. He and Aradia were attached at the hip. At least some things had changed since she had to (mis)fortune of seeing him last, like the lisp was gone. Good job Sollux! However, the thick glasses weren’t doing him any help in looking less like a nerd.

When Aradia opened the door, it was a surprise but a reasonable one. Who else to introduce two possible strangers who may or may not decide to live together after a short meeting. What she didn’t know was that the reason Aradia was there was really only to make sure the two didn’t start attacking one another verbally before anything could get done. 

Walking into the living apartment proper and seeing Sollux waiting however caused Vriska to freeze where she stood. Sollux noticed the two entered and looked between them both. He was confused until squinting and leaning forward he began to recognize just who Aradia had brought into his home. 

“What the fuck Aradia? Why is she here?” He’s angry that much anyone could tell, and all Vriska can think is how the feeling is mutual. 

Deciding to fake confidence till the end, Vriska struts into the room with her face held high. “Hello to you too Sollux, it’s been a while. Ready to live together?” Her smile was predatory and wide. 

Solllux recoiled so far, he almost fell over. Aradia laughed at him walking past where Vriska had stopped again and sitting next to him. It reminds her who is the cause for this whole awkward encounter anyway. Stupid Aradia, you’re no friend to either now.

“Fuck you,” Sollux spits out to Vriska. He then immediately turns to Aradia and begins whining, “Why her Aradia? I thought you said it was someone decent.”

Aradia laughs again, “I didn’t say decent, I said trustworthy. As in trustworthy to pay her rent on time.” 

Vriska still feels skittish but she decides that ultimately, even living with Sollux is better than living with Aranea. She takes a seat across from the other two and starts to plea her own case as well. “I might be a ‘huge bitch’ and all, but my word is my word. You will have it, and I will pay my rent. I won’t even get in your way! We’ll hardly ever see each other.” 

Even Aradia is taken aback by that statement, which rude Vriska thinks before focusing on Sollux’s expression as it contorts into a mixture of disgust and pain. “Fine, only because I know you probably won’t kill us in our sleep and we really need someone else to help pay. Surprised you’re that desperate though, is staying with your girlfriend really that bad?”

“Living with Aranea was the worst mistake I ever made, anything is better than that. Even living with you,” Vriska tries not to flinch when he mentions her ex. Of course none of them know about their split, of course she’d leave it to Vriska to tell everyone in their shared circle. 

“Just so you know Vriska, there is someone else living here! She’s not here right now, but Sollux was so desperate that he didn’t wait for her to come home. I’m sure you’ll get along!” Aradia interjects smiling brightly, Vriska can only nod quietly as she finally takes in her new home. It’s nice enough.

“So there’s only two rooms, but three people? Will we be room buddies as well? Also furniture, I have none,” If she has to share a room Vriska might just run back to Aranea.

Sollux laughs harshly, “God no. I don’t want that and I’d never force you onto someone else, and this place came fully furnished so you’re good on that.” 

It’s enough, Vriska nods and watches as Aradia pulls out some papers and shows her where to sign. Surely this isn’t how someone is supposed to rent an apartment, but Vriska isn’t one to question anything because it’s not as if she knows how. Within an hour, she walks out with a pair of her own keys and an agreement to come back the next day to move in. If only the rest of being an adult was as easy as this.

* * *

The next day begins as any other: waking up and rushing to work while avoiding Aranea, and then suffering the required eight hours, and then returning home and collapsing on the couch. Today however is different from others, because the moment she’s able to get up again, Vriska grabs her meager belongings and leaves leaving the keys under the mat outside. After a moment of consideration she texts Aranea explaining the situation and sends a weak thanks for letting her freeload.

While heading to the part of the city where her new apartment is, Vriska made a mental list of new things she needed to buy. It mostly consisted of blankets and towels, some toiletries and plenty of snacks. No one could say that she didn’t have any skills in prioritization. First however, was dropping off her bag of clothes and putting all that away. 

Entering the apartment, it was dark and quiet. No one even seemed to acknowledge her arrival. Or so Vriska had thought, seeing Sollux stick his head out of the larger master bedroom and nodding when he recognized Vriska. She nodded back silently. Entrance gained, Vriska went to find the smaller second bedroom to settle in. 

First thing she pulled out of her bag was the ratty old blanket from her childhood. It was orange and had a big sun in the middle. It was ancient and she was never getting rid of the thing. After laying that across the mattress, Vriska started pulling out her clothes and settling in. It was a quiet affair, the only sound beyond the rustling of cloth was the light traffic outside her window. The last thing at the bottom of the bag was a shirt of her ex’s. Vriska froze staring at it, her heart breaking into a million pieces as if the split happened just that day. Feeling numb, she pinched it in her fingers and walked outside the apartment to toss it down the garbage chute in the hallway. 

Instead of returning to her room, Vriska left the building to go buy what she needed. Which, when trying to juggle all the things she bought on one arm, she belatedly realized was a bad idea to do without any help. Unluckily it wasn’t like she had anyone to call anyways, Vriska had always been really good at burning bridges faster than she could build any. 

Once she managed to drag everything inside, Vriska felt better. This was a new beginning, sure she was stuck living around presumably people who have known her longer than she’d personally like. But that didn’t stop her for feeling like this was a chance to do better. She can start by being nicer to Sollux than she’s been before. It’ll go great!

Vriska flops onto her bed and revels in it. It was so much softer than the cot they have given her on the Mindfang. She considered if she had died and somehow managed to sneak into heaven. The thought was ruined with a grumbling stomach, no one could be in heaven and possibly ever feel this hungry. Whinely loudly, Vriska rolled off the bed and onto the floor and with momentous effort she pushed herself off the floor. 

The apartment was dark this time when she walked through. The only light was from the streetlights outside, Vriska felt her way through the kitchen and turned on the light over the stove so she could at least see where she was putting her hands. With enough light to see the general shape of things, Vriska went right to the fridge and pulled out on apple. It wasn’t a full meal, but it was healthy enough.

While munching on the apple, Vriska walked into the living room and looked at pictures decorating the walls and furniture. She could recognize Aradia Sollux, and Sollux’s rich but elusive girlfriend Feferi which all made sense. There were of course other friends of his and perhaps the other roommate’s, some she could recognize, some she couldn’t. In the dark lighting however, Vriska couldn’t be sure who the other person that appeared in a fair amount of the photos. She could vaguely recognize it as a person she’s most likely met once or twice; hopefully it wasn’t a person who hated her, there were a lot of those. That would sure be unlucky. 

Vriska returned to the kitchen to finish her apple. Leaning against the counter and slowly biting pieces off, she gave herself a moment to really appreciate what lay before her. A quiet new apartment with someone who didn’t wish her dead, and a sense of calm, like something good was soon to come. For just this instant, Vriska allowed herself to consider herself lucky for scoring such a nice apartment and this new chance. Her luck has been really bad for a while, so it was long due for some good luck for once.

* * *

First nights in new places always bring about the mild morning panic of “oh god where the hell am I,” and this isn’t any exception. It isn’t until Vriska manages to drag herself out of bed and then, into the kitchen to watch Sollux leave with a cup of coffee that she remembers. Both jump and stare at one another, Vriska laughs shakily and dances around him to reach the fridge. She guesses that both had forgot about the other, it’ll take a while to get used to. 

There’s a rustling sound behind her. Vriska tries not to jump again when Sollux’s dry voice speaks out, “Our other roommate is coming back today, I’ll be busy working in my room so please don’t kill each other. There is only so much that our landlord is willing to deal with. Unfortunately murder isn’t one of them.”

Vriska laughs loud and harshly, “No promises nerd.”

Sollux just huffs and leaves without saying anything else. With him out of the way, she moves again and tries to remember where the small amount of groceries she bought were placed. It took about half an hour, but Vriska leaves victorious with a bowl of cereal, sweet sugary cereal. 

She’s sitting in the living room, some children’s morning cartoon on when the door opens. Vriska looks up, spoon halfway to her mouth and watches as someone shoulders their way into the apartment. She reasons that this must be the third roommate and is about to say hello. However since she can’t really tell who the person is until they look up, she waits for them too look over. The moment they lift their head, she recognizes who exactly the girl in the pictures was. Vriska then immediately decides she still has all the back luck. All of it.


	2. pranks? in my home? more likely than you think

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who ever thought that letting John give anyone ideas was ever smart. Vriska is currently ready to destroy her past self for having gone with his suggestion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact: no one is white thanks for listening
> 
> lmk any issues please n thanks i love validation but also having decent content

They don’t respond immediately instead staring blankly, and it’s only when Vriska puts her spoon down that they turn their head and call out for Sollux looking to their shared room. Vriska’s face twists and all she can think is how much a mistake this was, she never should have accepted anything from Aradia. For example, trusting her when she said she had a good place for Vriska to say, it was foolish to ever believe her. The third roommate was Terezi Pyrope, of course it was someone who hated her almost as much as she hated herself.

“Why is there someone else here Sollux!” Terezi’s voice is still just as grating and loud as it was at seventeen, bringing an instant scowl to Vriska’s face.

“I’m here because this is my apartment too now. Better get used to it,” The scowl turns into a grin when Terezi’s head snaps and is turned her way. It takes a moment for the voice to be placed but when she does, Terezi growls and turns to Sollux just as he steps into the room. She drops everything in her arms to grab his and drag him into their room.

Vriska can hear the muffled argument from her seat in the living room. Quietly she sneaks into the hallway to hear better, not daring to actually go up to the door lest they notice her snooping. Who knew how good Terezi’s ears were, her nose alone was terrifying. She couldn’t hear much but she did understand that Terezi was not happy. Vriska couldn’t help but share the sentiment. 

At the same time, was it really truly that awful? Vriska wasn’t happy either but she figured they could make it work somehow. Did Terezi really hate her that much? She couldn’t help the stinging itch in her chest. Sure Vriska didn’t like the woman either, but she also didn’t hate her so much as to move out or throw a childish fit over living together. 

It’s several minutes later when Terezi stalks out to grab her abandoned luggage, by then Vriska had already returned to quietly eating her now soggy cereal. Neither acknowledges the other and Vriska barely notes a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach when the bedroom door slammed back shut. Living here wasn’t going to be the fresh or pleasant start she had previously thought apparently. 

The rest of the day is spent quietly and problem free. Which honestly is most likely due to the fact that even after her shift at her job has ended, she still did not return to the apartment. It’s only when the sun has long set, and the nightly chill has permeated the air that Vriska does in fact go home. When she enters the apartment, she notices how Terezi is stretched across the couch. Her feet pressing against the side of Sollux’s thigh. Both look up when she enters, but it’s really only Sollux who can see her. 

Sollux looks back to his game on the tv; meanwhile Terezi, keeps watching as Vriska wordlessly grabs a snack and heads to her room. She takes a moment to awkwardly wave, unfortunately—or fortunately depending on the angle it was looked at—Terezi didn’t respond. The moment the door closed, Vriska heard light footsteps from the living room to her door. There was only one person who would stand there, and she was quiet for perhaps half a minute.

“I don’t know what you’re planning, but just know that you aren’t welcome here,” Terezi’s voice was cold. “If you hurt any of my friends don’t think I won’t hesitate to enact proper justice onto you. Either with the law or by my own hand, I’m not afraid of you.” She continued, Vriska recalled the concept of how supposedly saying you weren’t afraid of something general meant that you actually were afraid. She knew that much from personal experience as well. 

Vriska opened the door with a sigh, watching as Terezi refused to lean back and instead stubbornly remained in her personal space. “Look believe it or not, I’m not always out to hurt someone! Maybe I just want to live my life too. Besides it’s not like I even knew you lived here, I’ve known Aradia for a long time she’s the one who first offered the place to me.”

Terezi’s face twitched, “Fine, stay if you want. But don’t think for a second that means I’ll be okay with it or you.” She turns around sharply and walks with too high steps back to the couch where Sollux was still gaming. 

Watching her go, Vriska felt a small laugh bubble up and out. “Wouldn’t have it any other way Pyrope,”she said shaking her head as the bubble laughs continued.

* * *

It isn’t till a few days later that Vriska comes up with a way to cope with living with someone as annoying as Terezi Pyrope. It was all thanks to good old John Egbert. She was on her lunch break at work texting him when he had asked about her new living arrangements and if they were better to living with Aranea.

 

EB: how’s the new apartment!  
EB: anyone cool living there?  
AG: John of couuuuuuuurse you know no one cool lives here.  
AG: 8esides me of course.  
EB: not really answering the main question vriska.  
AG: Fine! 8ut only 8ecause you’re asking so nicely. :::;)  
AG: Did you know Terezi and Sollux live together?   
EB: uh yeah? they have for a really long time.  
EB: karkat used to live with them too!  
EB: he just moved out to live with jade and dave though.  
EB: why are you asking?  
EB: oh my god vriska do you live with them????????  
AG: Ugh.  
EB: oh my god!  
AG: It really isn’t that 8ig of a deal John!  
EB: except terezi hates you!  
EB: how did you even get her to agree to that?  
AG: It sort of just happened! 8y the time either of us realized, it was too l8.

 

The conversation carries on like this for several minutes, when finally John comes up with what Vriska is sure to be a disaster of an idea. Even more than the time he had managed to accidentally set fire to something in their biology class in their first year. It was still a little cool though. Or maybe that was just her old crush on him speaking. No one could say that Vriska didn’t do listen to friends at least.

 

EB: why don’t you prank her though?  
EB: that’ll totally get her.  
AG: John that is the dorkiest suggestion I’ve ever heard.  
AG: And that’s saying a lot when you’re involved.  
EB: no i’m serious!  
EB: you can totally get her, she’s so easy to prank.  
EB: plus her reactions are totally hilarious!  
EB: and a little cute.  
AG: Ew John, gross.  
AG: If you think it’ll annoy her, then I’ll try.  
AG: Just for you.

 

Together they both started planning what John promised would be the greatest prank to end all pranks. It was only until after she had gotten back from work that anything actually started taking place. A lot of googling and an embarrassing amount of hours later, Vriska finally had a plan she felt confident enough to put into place. 

However, actually getting the everything needed wasn’t easy as picking an idea. Shrimp scented spray just wasn’t the type of item you could find in the local supermarket unfortunately. What was wrong with people. So it wasn’t until about a week later that she finally held the can in her hands. 

Vriska was already laughing at her masterful prank before she had even moved to set it up. If anyone walked by her room at saw a girl standing and laughing at a can of shrimp scented spray, they’d worry for her and themselves.

Luckily it was only Terezi, the prank victim who was also luckily unable to see, who noticed Vriska’s antics. She stopped in Vriska’s doorway and made a face, “What are you up to in here? Corrupting the public again are you?” 

Vriska laughed again, only awkwardly so. As subtly as possible, she placed the incriminating object on her desk chair, “Oh you know how it is. Telling kids to stay out of school and all that,” she said leaning against the desk and making vague gestures with her hands, smirking as confidently as she could. 

Terezi nodded slowly, “Yes you’re right, I do know.” She waited a moment, and when Vriska didn’t do anything she huffed and pushed off the doorframe turning and leaving to her own room. “Don’t let me catch you doing anything decent you hear?”

Turning around back to the instrument of pranking on her chair, Vriska pressed a hand to her mouth. Using all her willpower to not laugh, she couldn’t let the girl know she thought her as actually having a good sense of humor. Her eyes wide and with her right hand, Vriska tucked the scented spray into a drawer. Hiding it well away from prying eyes (Sollux) and pesky noses (Terezi). With that successfully hidden, Vriska felt she could breath again in relative peace. 

Her phone gave a small beep from where it was on her bed, a quick check revealed that it was only John. Vriska couldn’t help but smile, as if it was any surprise he would be checking in on the progress of the prank. He was almost more excited than the woman setting it up herself was, guy really loved pranking people what could she say.

 

EB: did you get the goods?  
EB: man i can’t wait till you spring this on terezi!  
AG: They just came in today. ::::)  
AG: Soon Terezi will have to smell lovely shrimp allllllll day long.  
EB: she’ll never see it coming!  
AG: John.  
EB: too far?  
AG: Too far.

 

Moving on from the topic of Terezi and the prank on her. The two talked chatting about John’s current schooling life and Vriska’s new job. Sollux was out on a date with Feferi, so when Terezi left the apartment, Vriska sent John a final goodbye message and dashed out of her room. 

Quickly, she moved to Terezi and Sollux’s shared room. Immediately she skips over what she assumed to be Sollux’s part of the room with all of the computer parts and what not. Terezi’s side is…surprisingly bright. The phrase “it looks like a rainbow barfed in here” was the only thing that could be said about it. 

Luckily enough the spray she was looking for was easy enough to find. Sparing a small moment to feel bad that Sollux had to be caught up in this, Vriska replaced the labels and put the new canister down exactly as it had been before.

Vriska left the room, walking back to her own with a confident stride. She couldn’t help the small giggle that that escaped past her lips when she closed the door and leaned against it. Everything was set up, this was going to go perfectly. There was literally no way this could go wrong at all. 

* * *

The next few days after, Vriska was intensely watching Terezi every time she went into her room. Watching, waiting, listening for any sounds of Terezi’s death via shrimp scented air. John could hardly hold himself in excitement either, constantly texting Vriska and asking if anything has happened yet. If she wasn’t just as eager to see the results as John, Vriska might have chewed him out for being so insistent on being updated.

After about two days, John’s messaging started to slow down. On the third day, Vriska herself started to forget why she was constantly checking after Terezi’s movements within the apartment. So of course it would be on the fourth day that all hell broke loose. Vriska watches mildly from the kitchen as Terezi gets up and walking to her room, quickly coming into the living room with something in hand.

It’s the air spray.

Vriska starts to get up from her chair in a panic when she realizes what’s about to happen, “Terezi! Don’t spray that here, you really don’t want to do that here in the living room.” She speaks in a rush, the words hardly getting out in time.

“I’m not going to let everything stay musty Vriska! I can hardly breath in here. I don’t know if you’re aware but my nose is all I really have.”

“Then open a window, that’ll help enough!” Vriska tries to reason as she moves across the small apartment to grab the spray away from Terezi. 

Terezi stubbornly makes a face at Vriska’s general direction quickly saying, “I’ll do it after bossy pants.” She then turns and begins to spray moving her arm in an arc. 

Knowing what was coming, Vriska immediately holds her breath. It didn’t matter, nothing could stop the shrimp scent. She has made so many mistakes in life, and letting John convince her this was a good idea was most definitely up there with the worst. Meanwhile Terezi doesn’t breathe till she is done, she takes a deep breath expecting the fresh scent of fake flowers instead getting the full strength of the shrimpy air. Immediately she choked and half collapsed onto the couch behind her, one single hiss escaping her mouth. It sounds suspiciously like “Vriskaaaaaaaaa.”

The woman herself is standing stock still, watching Terezi with nervous energy wracking through her body. She watched as Terezi got more and more agitated with each passing second. Terezi opens her mouth to speak, and instantly chokes again only releasing a groan.

She gives up on the hope is being able to speak, choosing to show her anger by raising her arm still holding the offending canister and moving it to spray Vriska in retaliation. Vriska screams as the spray hits her clothes, and she keeps screaming as she starts to wrestle with Terezi for the can. Eventually she manages to get it and sprays the first part of Terezi she can reach. 

This time Terezi screams, “FUCK!” At the top of her lungs, and with that both girls collapse onto the floor heaving for air hoping somehow miraculously the stench of shrimp has lessened.

It has not.

A minute and some passed while their breathing calmed down and got shallower to avoid the shrimp. Terezi whispers something soft causing Vriska to make a quiet questioning sound.

“I wish I had opened the window first before spraying that monstrosity.”

Vriska huffs a little in amusement, “Well now you know. Obviously the answer is to listen to me more, and now I’ll tell you to open the window so we can air this mess out.”

Terezi whines deep and low in her throat, but a tired look from Vriska and the knowledge that this mess of a woman really is willing to die here with only shrimp to comfort her, is what moves her. She crawls to the window and climbs up it. When she gets it open she dramatically leaps to the couch collapsing once more with a sigh of relief.

Sweet fresh air how they’ve missed thee.

With that now settled, Terezi takes a moment to worry if the smell will permeate the furniture. Vriska assures her it wouldn’t, but that doesn’t mean Aradia and Sollux won’t notice when they arrive.

“Oh no.”

“Terezi R. Pryope! Did you forget that our dear roommate was bringing his best friend to our humble adobe?” Vriska mock gasped, looking up from the floor below.

She only remembered while trying very hard to ignore the fact that John is an awful horrible person and that she never should have listened to a dork like him. Because Sollux will kill her once he enters the apartment, and both Aradia and Terezi will only stand back and laugh as he does so. Everything in her life has been a mistake, she reaffirms that this very moment.

Terezi is still laying on the couch, her blank eyes staring upwards when Vriska gets up with a sigh. Only one thing to do now is her reasoning as she heads back to her room and returns with the original scented spray. Terezi still hasn’t moved, but she is paying careful attention to Vriska’s movements.

Until she hears the hissing of aerosol spray again and she sits up turning towards the sound and near yelling again, “Vriska! What are you doing that’s only going to make it worse!”

She launches at the general direction of where Vriska is and ends up with a face full of pain as she hits her shoulder. Vriska steps back in surprise and mild fear of any attack. Terezi manages to grab the canister in the surprise and jumps back, but it was too late. The mixed smell of fake flowers and shrimp was already in the air and there was no way to get it out that wasn’t just waiting and hoping for the best. 

Both Terezi and Vriska were standing in the middle of the living room, facing one another with disgust on their faces when the front door opened. Aradia poked her head in first, and smiled when she saw them standing there. Sollux only scowled at what he (wasn’t wrong to) assumed was another petty argument.

“Hey what’re you two fighting about to—oh my god.” Aradia’s face instantly paled as she gagged and took several large steps back from the living room.

“What did you two idiots do this time?” Sollux asked, irritation clear in his voice as he took off his jacket. “What the fuck.”

Terezi moved first turning behind her and smiling sheepishly towards the other two, “Hi Aradia. Welcome home Sollux, today’s a nice day isn’t it.” 

Sollux was clearly determined to stand his ground, either that or it wasn’t as strong where he stood than where Terezi and Vriska were at the epicenter. Giving it a second thought, Vriska reasons that it’s most likely the latter. 

She watches mildly amused as Sollux gets more and more angry at the situation. Her eyes meet Aradia’s for a second and they both share a small laugh, as if nothing had ever happened between them. The moment broke when Terezi shouted Vriska’s name loudly and the woman in question jumped in surprise. Not that she’d ever admit it though. 

“Yes dear?” Is all she manages turning to smile pleasantly at Terezi.

“It’s your fault,” she emphasizes. “So why don’t you explain to Sollux why our living room will smell like shrimp for an indeterminate amount of time. It’s only fair he knows why.” Terezi’s expression was vicious and sharp, Vriska felt irritated but she couldn’t help but see where John had come from earlier. Calling a pranked Terezi cute.

“Weeeeeeeell,” Vriska dawdled, not really wanting to admit the real reason for what is now looking to be horribly embarrassing and childish. Even if she’d do it again, just…without Sollux or Aradia finding out preferably. Even though with hindsight, that would have been impossible. 

“Tell us why Vriska or I swear to god. I will hack your laptop and I know there are things you don’t want others to see on it.” Sollux did not hold any punches, he was ready to strike at her throat. 

Vriska laughed nervously, “Oh noooooooo, my nudes. As if Captor, I’m a gift to the world and so is everything on my laptop.” 

Theres a cough from Terezi, she’s gesturing to just get on with it and stop prolonging the inevitable. Vriska let’s out a large sigh, “Fine. It was a dare from John, he really wanted to get at Terezi for something and he came over and did it himself while you two were out and it was just me.” No way were they knowing that this was actually something Vriska planned and put into action entirely too willingly.

“What the fuck John.” Is all Sollux can say along with a whisper of, “No one wants to see your skinny ass body anyway so thank fucking god for that.” Which rude.

Terezi just laughs and calls John a nerd, Aradia claps saying how everything is so fun in their apartment with all the shrimp in the air. Tavros apparently never does anything silly like a prank, and honestly Vriska isn’t even surprised that boy was the wettest of all wet blankets if she ever saw one. 

Vriska dips out as soon as the other three start making plans to go out since the living room was most likely a biohazard that would kill anyone who spent more than eight minutes in there. She waits until the door is closed and their voices fade out the hallway, she then pulls out her phone and types one text message.

She doesn’t send it, hell Vriska is even positive this number has blocked her. But the events of the day reminded her so much of her ex and stuff they would have once gotten up to, so it stays there even as the screen darkens. Vriska lays across her bed, as the world shifts into sunset and the room darkens, wondering how a stupid prank gone wrong ended with her wising she had a specific someone by her side.

Eventually, Vriska moved to pick up her phone and deleted the message instead sending John one about a mission complete. The contents were still there however, in the back of her mind. Haunting her. 

 

AG: I miss you.

* * *

It’s later, when she’s just getting home with Sollux that Terezi receives a text. She opens it and her phone informs her to no surprise that it’s John. Deciding that the living has to be safe now, she heads there to text him in relative privacy while Sollux beelines for their room.

 

EB: hehe!  
EB: how was the prank?  
GC: 1T W4S T3RR1BL3 JOHN  
GC: OUR L1V1NG ROOM W4S L3FT 4 W4ST3L4ND  
EB: yikes. what did vriska do?  
EB: i thought it was only supposed to be your room.  
GC: WH4T DO YOU M34N  
GC: “WH4T D1D VR1SK4 DO?” W4SN’T TH1S YOUR PR4NK?  
GC: >:?  
EB: she didn’t tell you?  
EB: oh man.  
EB: it was her idea! she planned and set it all up.  
EB: i think she was really excited.  
EB: all i did was tell her to prank you and cheer her on.  
GC: TH4T L1TTL3  
GC: 1 H4V3 TO G3T H3R B4CK FOR TH1S  
GC: TH4NKS FOR TH3 ID34 JOHN  
GC: I H4V3 PL4NS TO M4K3 >:]

 

\--  gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling  ectoBiologist [EB]  \--


	3. the heartbreaker herself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its been 5 mil years but u see Real Life was happening and that's it
> 
> i know the spacing is funky uh sorry for that haha

It had started out something like this.

“Anemoneway I don’t recall giving anyone clearance for a whalenormous treasure hunt. As the rightful heiress that sorta noise has to go through me yo!!!”

“Haha! Wow, I had no idea the Peixes sister was such a riot! At least, I HOPE you were trying to be funny with that remark.”

And ended a little like this.

“I think I might go actually.”

“Meenah! Please… you can’t!”

“I think this has gotta….be….it.”

The conversation played over and over again in Vriska’s head, it played right after it happened, it played again as she got on the ship without her. It played even now as she watched Meenah from across the shop. Why was she here? Her workplace was supposed to be safe, no one was supposed to come in here. Vriska turned around and asked her coworker to cover her for an early break, in order to avoid Meenah as soon as she saw her.

Meenah has broken up with her a week before the both of them were supposed to start volunteering on a local historical ship Mindfang. She had been offered a new opportunity in another city and Meenah played it as if she were considering. Both she and Vriska knew it was a done deal the moment it was on the table. Meenah wasn't going to miss out on something new if it meant more money.

Vriska was left heartbroken and miserable, but she was nothing if not determined. When a week had passed, Vriska boarded the ship they had planned to be on together. She was alone but she figured this was a perfect chance for a break from life if anything. Unfortunately, it hadn’t worked out and Vriska was left with no choice but to rejoin the real world.

It was her first serious relationship, so when Vriska saw Meenah at her workplace, only a month after breaking up it was understandable as to why she was so upset.

Hiding behind various bookshelves, she watched Meenah wander around and look for something. Vriska was trapped admiring her beauty, remembering the soft kisses they had once shared. Suddenly Meenah’s head turned her way and Vriska ducked down, crawling to the employee’s break room to wallow in self-pity alone. She hoped it was only a one-time coincidence that wouldn’t happen again.

Unfortunately, when Meenah returned the next day, she had a feeling it wasn’t just a one-time thing. And instead, that Meenah was there for her specifically. When she was approached after her shift by Meenah, she knew that it likely wasn’t her idea either. Vriska was going to have some words with her cousin when she got home, this was just cruel for the both of them.

“Hey, Serket.”

“Peixes wannabe.”

Meenah grins, baring all her teeth at Vriska. She used to think it was enticing, now it was only mildly irritating. This is how it used to be, all sharp edges and harsh words. This was easy, it was nice, but it also reminded Vriska of why they broke up in the first place.

Something in Meenah shifts, her eyes watching Vriska’s as her mouth ticks down into a minor frown. Another thing Vriska used to see as cute, her lips were just so kissable like this. She pinched her thigh, focus Vriska focus.

“Can we talk?” It’s Meenah who asks and Vriska wonders why Meenah would ever think she wanted to talk with the girl who broke her heart. To Vriska's personal dismay, that doesn’t change the fact that she nods and leads her to a nearby cafe.

It takes roughly ten minutes to walk the block or two to the cafe. The entire time Vriska feels she is running both hot and cold at the same time. Meenah takes care to keep her distance but either due to the crowd or simply forgetting, their arms occasionally brush one another. The minor acrobatics Vriska’s heart does is both familiar and devastating. If she's being honest to her self the whole situation feels like that.

By the time they reach the front door of the cafe, Vriska pauses as she watches Meenah enter. Wondering if this really is what she wants to do. If it’s even worth going through the heartbreak all over again. Vriska’s eyes wander to the door, she considers just turning around and going home, avoiding everything like she has before.

Suddenly the door opens and Vriska is met with a woman more gorgeous than anyone she’s ever seen. She’s shocked still, but the beautiful stranger smiles gently and holds the door open. Slowly without really thinking beyond the odd realization that this woman had piercings similar to what Vriska had almost gotten herself until Meenah dumped her.

Ugh Meenah.

Vriska finally remembers why she was here, she decides to enter. As the door closes behind her and the warm scent of coffee greats her. Vriska can’t shake the feeling of familiarity that comes from the stranger.

Seeing Meenah looking and waiting patiently for her at a table with a cup of her own, Vriska sighs and pushes the thought from her mind. She orders her own drink and sits down across from her ex-girlfriend. The first few minutes are filled with awkward glances and mediocre coffee. Meenah breaks first, she catches Vriska’s gaze and holds it stubbornly.

“Sorry,” Is all she mutters.

“Haha! Sorry? That’s it? Not even ‘I’m sorry’ or any excuse why you just left me and moved right before we were supposed to leave and live on a ship together for six months?” Vriska didn’t have any energy left in her body to feel much. She reasons if she did, the twisting swirl of emotions muted in her chest would have been red hot and bursting at her seams.

“If that’s all this is, then I’m gone. Sorry I was 'too boring' for you,” Vriska starts to get up already thinking of things to do when she gets home. Meenah grabs her arm and holds on, her eyes freezing Vriska in place. They were wide and desperate. Damn her to hell and back, Vriska thinks as she unwillingly sits back down.

Meenah’s mouth was pinched and she muttered something about “why’s this shit so hard?” Vriska pretended she didn’t hear it, she really didn’t want to hear any of it. She takes another deep breath and Meenah starts to speak again.

“I like you a lot an all but like, you changed a lot. Not better or worse or anyfin, just different," Meenah starts.

It’s hard taking anything that just came out of Meenah’s mouth when she’s using fish puns, but Vriska decides to try despite her annoyance. For the girl she had once thought to be the love of her life.

“From the way you were when we met, dunno man. What I see though is someone who gradually turned like, vulnerable as shell,” Meenah continues. Putting emphasis on the last word and Vriska’s patience for the puns is quickly running dangerously thin already. Her expression becomes slightly more annoyed as Meenah speaks, nonetheless she continues, “That is scary to me because of the way I am."

Meenah takes a deep breath, steadying herself, and then finishing with, "I’m…bad.”

Vriska’s mouth twists and this time it’s her not allowing Meenah to look away as she almost yells out, “No. NO. You aren’t some pathetic loser, and you’re not bad!”

Instead what she does say is, "So what. I am too, that doesn't mean anything." Pushing away the desire to cry and instead focus on the anger from betrayal was easier, kind of.

Meenah is fidgeting and starting to look around the cafe for an escape route but Vriska keeps charging on. “I don’t know why you feel like that, but it isn’t true. You obviously made the right choice leaving though.”

Ignoring when she’s gone too far and the pain it causes others has always been her strong point, admitting that when it came to Meenah was…hard. Meenah’s expression was full of pain and Vriska felt a sudden lurch in her stomach, but she held strong. Her outside act was angry; inside she was a mantra of “don’t cry not yet, don’t cry not yet, she doesn’t get your tears, not any more so don’t cry yet.”

With all the strength she could muster, Vriska met Meenah’s eyes. She focused on not tearing up and instead was as grim as she could manage, “You’re the only one who made me feel good about being here. Anywhere.”

Meenah sniffled and started to say something but Vriska cut her off, “You are not worthless for being a bad person. But you’re right, this is it.”

Words were never her strong point, but Meenah seems to get the idea well enough. Closing her eyes, Vriska stands up and starts to leave. Right as she’s halfway out, Meenah speaks up one more time. Barely enough loud enough to be heard above the ambient cafe sound but Vriska still manages to catch it, “I’m really sorry.”

The door closes with a small jingle of the bells up top.

* * *

  
It’s when she’s almost home that Vriska gets a call when she checks it’s Aranea. Knowing her, she won’t give up until Vriska talks, she knows she has to answer. But Vriska also doesn’t feel like she can talk without breaking into tears. So instead she sends off a quick text, holding her phone tight with clammy hands.

AG: What do you want.  
Aranea: Am I not allowed to see how my dear 8a8y cousin is adjusting to her new home?  
AG: I’m not in the mo8d Aranea.  
AG: Today has been annoying enough without you inserting y8urself.  
AG: Oh dear? Has something trou8led you?  
AG: Oh fuck off, I 8et you know what happen8d.  
AG: You set th8s up didn’t you, y8u told her where I work.  
AG: Fuck you for that 8y the way.  
Aranea: I did. Was I wrong to?  
Aranea: I had thought you would have wanted to talk to her? It was all for you.  
Aranea: Closure is important in ending such a long rel8ionship. It’s for the 8est, for 8oth of you.  
AG: No 8ne asked you to 8ntervene like that.  
AG: Just stay away from me.  
Aranea: Meenah did.  
\-- arachnidsGrip [AG] blocked XXXXXXXX [Aranea] \--

Vriska pockets her phone angrily, she’ll probably unblock Aranea later. Emphasis on probably. Right now, she was too filled with heartbreak and anger to think about anything beyond getting home as fast she could. Which really meant walking as fast as she could without running, and maybe shoving a few people here and there when they were in her way. Really it was their fault, for existing and being in her way.

Once she was finally home, Vriska moped about. Her mind was still reeling from what had just happened, her heart was in pieces shattered on the ground. Hardly paying attention to whatever Terezi was cackling about this time as she headed straight to the kitchen for some comfort food. Right there on the counter was a cake, all alone and incredibly delicious looking.

“Tavros came over and baked that with me earlier, go ahead and have some if you want,” Terezi said. That was all the direction Vriska needed, she had a bad day and free cake would always help make any day a better day.

She definitely did not expect it to blow up in her face when it did. Even with a face covered in cake and none in her stomach, this was still better than the rest of the day. The bar has been set so low. It’s tragic.

Terezi’s laughter brought her out of the frozen haze, Vriska slowly turns her head and wipes at her face slightly. The horrible woman is leaning against the wall, nearly collapsing in her laughter. All Vriska can do is make a vaguely confused sound.

“This! Is how you prank someone Serket! Oh my god hehehehe, wait till I tell Tavros that our cake worked! It was so worth all the convincing,” She’s already pulling out her phone with one hand, and wiping at her eyes with the other.

Vriska is stuck staring dumbly at Terezi, her mind moving at one mile per hour. She forced out a laugh, nearly choking on the air. Her throat is so tight, why is it so tight? Another forced laugh spills up and over. Standing in the kitchen, laughing at the dumb prank Terezi had literally cooked up, there was too much happening in one awful day.

She’s laughing so hard that her eyes are watering. It was ridiculous, the prank wasn’t anywhere near that funny! Vriska was too busy laughing to notice that Terezi wasn’t texting Tavros, she was listening to Vriska with a confused expression.

“I know the prank was good, but I don’t think you should be laughing that much when I totally owned you,” Terezi says this slowly as if still thinking her words through. She tilts her head one way and then the other, taking as much consideration as she could for the situation before her.

By now Vriska was starting to hiccup, Terezi words managed to break through the laughing frenzy she had entered. Instead, Vriska was standing there with wet cheeks and annoying hiccups. It didn’t feel good, none of this felt good. Everything was absurd and Vriska wondered what would happen if she just buried herself under the building and just laid there until she stopped having feelings.

If only that were how the world worked instead, she had to suck it all up, “Hahahahahahahaha, you think I was laughing because this was funny? It was sad Terezi, really sad. Did Tavros tell you this was a good prank? It’s something a baby like him would come up with.” Vriska sneers and grins even though she doesn’t feel it when Terezi mumbles about how Tavros’s idea was a good plan.

“I was just laughing at how pathetic and babyish the prank was. If you really want to get me, you’ll have to step up your game,” Vriska continued as she glanced at Terezi and smirked as an idea came to her mind, “Redglare. I’ll show you a real prank just you wait.”

She laughed one more time, high and nasally, leaving the kitchen with an even more confused Terezi behind. “Your prank was just as bad Mindfang!” Terezi shouted out behind her, but she listened carefully to Vriska’s exit.

“Even worse actually! But I’ll get you, you’ll come to justice after that.” She added quickly after Vriska had already closed the door, voice mildly softer than before.

Vriska flinched at the use of Mindfang. Back when they had first met and before everything happened, years ago Terezi and Vriska had met as young teens on an old role-play forum. Redglare and Mindfang were their self-insert personas, she really brought it upon herself calling Terezi Redglare however.

As Vriska threw herself on her bed. Fully ready to let herself cry her heart out, she found her eyes dry as a desert and instead itchy from the tears earlier. Her body and soul was drained, but she wasn’t able to sleep just quite yet. The sheets were soft on her face, the comfort of her bedding made Vriska want to cry all over again suddenly. Instead, she laid there sobbing softly into her comforter.

Eventually, she finds herself rolling over and opening her laptop, fingers sliding slowly over the keyboard. Often missing their targeted letters. After some tries, she finally managed to get something coherent.

* * *

  
The next morning welcomed a blurry eyed Vriska who stumbled into the kitchen and bumped into Sollux’s back as he poured coffee and just kept doing it. After the fourth time, he turned around and caught her shoulders directing Vriska to sit down at the table. Soon enough he placed a cup of coffee before her, and as if she were in a trance Vriska picked up the mug and began to drank without questioning it.

Sollux watches her quietly before he decides to comment after Vriska managed to spill some of the coffee on her shirt, “Somehow you’re worse than Terezi, at least she’s actually blind. I think you might just be stupid.”

“Shut up Solllux. Since when did you lose your lisp anyway,” Vriska scowls into her mug both hands clasped tight around it.

Now it was Sollux’s turn to scowl, “A year ago if you weren’t so self-absorbed you’d know that. Among some other things.”

Vriska made a face at him, “Whatever nerd.” Anything else she mumbles into her coffee is lost as Terezi loudly enters the room.

Terezi immediately latches onto Sollux badgering him about an appointment of his, telling him to not miss it this time or Aradia would rain hell on the both of them. Vriska watches the exchange silently, hiding most her face behind her mug.

She isn’t sure what it was that tipped Terezi off to her presence, maybe it was just the scent of coffee, or she swallowed too loudly or something. But for the rest of the conversation between her and Sollux, Terezi seemed to be keeping an ear on whatever sound Vriska made. A small clink from putting down the now empty mug meant Terezi would twitch, a shuffling of hands and she nearly turned towards Vriska.

Vriska watches Terezi blatantly from behind Sollux. The small expressions she made, the way her face changes when she’s really laughing, her hair curling at its ends as it touches her neck. Vriska nearly slaps herself in the face and she can feel her, now wasn’t the time to familiarize herself with how pretty Terezi is again. No, it was time to start getting ready for a revenge prank. She stands up in such a haste that the table rattles and both Terezi and Sollux stop talking and turn to her.

“Sorry gotta go, busy woman and all.” Is all Vriska offers them as she rushes back to her room and opens up her laptop once more. Sitting there on the screen is just “Neophyte Redglare” left on an otherwise empty word document. A good enough place to start if anything.


End file.
